Self-Owned.

So recently, there’s been some mad drama going on at my Formspring

Who’s the star of the show?

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PEGGY HENG!!
Or THY-DOWAGER as she likes to be called.

If you dunno who she is, don’t ask me, you can google her.

I wasn’t going to blog about this issue since at first I thought it was no biggie, but figured it’d make for gold content, so here’s your juicy bit of gossip today!!!

You heard it first on underage-girl.blogspot.com ;)

So it all started with………… this photo.

Dowager (I love calling her that) camwhored with a dirty 2 dollar note, and posted the picture on her blog.

And now, Wendy aka Xiaxue comes into the picture.

Wendy saw the picture and told me about it on MSN, and after laughing about it, she posted her opinions on Twitter, saying something like she saw a picture of someone putting a $2 note in her mouth to act cute, and she can’t believe somebody would do something so gross coz money is really filthy (IT IS.)

Note that Wendy was nice enough to not reveal Dowager’s name on Twitter, so it was anyone’s guess who it could be…

Anyway, some telltale minion went to report to Dowager on her Formspring page, telling Dowager that Wendy talked about her on Twitter regarding the $2 note, to which Dowager had varied replies for:

Dowager’s first reply was “I can’t be bothered”,

and her next one was “Wendy is an amazing girl with talent”,

and her next reply would then be TOTALLY different again, going as far as to say Wendy is “fat”, “mean”, “plastic” and a whole bunch of other lame insults.

(DON’T BELIEVE ME?? Go look at Dowager’s Formspring! ALL the evidence is there – If she doesn’t delete it!)

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…And then somebody left her this question on her Formspring:

LOL!!!

Apparently she has no idea why” Wendy talks shit about her on Twitter (not the first time, and I don’t blame her)…

Maybe it’s coz you’re so damn unlikeable, Dowager?!?

Anyway, this whole $2-note-bitching-on-Twitter-and-Formspring thing was between Dowager and Wendy..

But now that Dowager’s decided to conveniently include the fact that I’m a “suck up” out of nowhere, then shit just got PERSONAL, bitch.

People told me about the insulting things she’s been saying about me on her Formspring, and at first I was gonna ignore her, but she persisted comment after comment, so eventually I started insulting her back…

And the insults just went back and forth, and back and forth - if you have the time, you can check it all out on our Formspring accounts, it goes way back and would probably answer a lot of your questions.

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Anyway this blog post is not a showcase for who has the better insults/comebacks (obviously me though hehe) or who is at fault, I was prepared to let it all go since it was just 2 bitches going at each other and it’d die out eventually…


But out of nowhere, THIS HAPPENED:


HAHAHAHAH!!!!!!


YOU LOSER!
With a capital L on your forehead!

Or maybe on your chin coz there’s more space.

Do you guys even realize how classic this is?!?!!?

If you didn’t notice before, look at the account name of the person who left me those 2 comments!!

YES, THEY’RE FROM DOWAGER HERSELF INDEED.

Miss Dowager left a SELF-PRAISING comment on my Formspring,

posing as an outsider, saying she’s “So much better than me” without realizing that she forgot to ask the question Anonymously!

Epic shit or what!! Couldn’t stop LOL-ing when I realized what happened!!!!!!!!!!!!

Got really so dumb one anot?

….In this case, yes.

You’ve really outdone yourself dear.

And when I say outdone, I really mean Self-Pwned.

So after awhile, I suppose she realized the utterly stupid thing she’d just done, thus freaking out a bit and during a fit of confusion and embarrassment, came up with a pathetic cover-up that said:

“HAHA YOU LIKE THAT? I HACKED INTO PEGGY’S ACCOUNT JUST TO TYPE THAT TO U. SUCK THAT!”

Omg!!

This is just so classic Dowager! Incoherent and lame. Even just by the typing I can tell it’s her, lol!

Anyway, from my replies to her in the screen shot, you could tell that I wasn’t fully aware of what was going on at the start…

I was just as confused as anyone else in my situation would be!

I didn’t notice who the questions were from, I receive a lot in a day so I didn’t think very much about it.

But people started telling me, “OMG Peggy didn’t set her status to anonymous and now she’s freaking out HAHAH what a loser!!!”


And EVERYONE was laughing their asses off!

So not only did she #FAIL by trying to self-praise on my Formspring and ended up owning herself instead, the very next thing she does is try to cover up by pretending she got hacked??

LAME MAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

Even if you wanna lie, do it properly plz! Say it was your sister who did it or something moderately believable.


HELLO, who would wanna hack your Formspring account?

Got gold and diamonds inside izzit?

Formspring accounts are worthless, even if they’d wanna hack you, they’d hack your blog right??

Why isn’t your blog hacked instead / too ?

Plus, if the hacker hated me but liked you so much, why didn’t he / she just use an Anonymous name to leave a comment on my Formspring - why did they have to HACK you just to send such a lame message???

You seriously think anybody would be so free?

Meh. Seems like a pretty shitty way of showing a blogger your support – by hacking them!

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AND
DOWAGER’S #FAILS DON’T STOP THERE!!!!

Everyone was going nuts on my Formspring, talking about what a huge liar and loser she is, etc….

But then, it gets more exciting -

Dowager then DELETED her Formspring!


She didn’t answer her readers questions of “Peggy were you really self-praising?!” but instead, completely disappeared from the cyber world for what she claims is 2 whole days.

What happened? Did she really freak out that badly?

I suppose it’s in order to support her claim of getting hacked?


“This user has disabled their account.”

Note that it said USER has disabled their account”, not “this account has been terminated” – Thus it was done by the owner of the account and not a management error by Formspring. Plus I’ve never heard of spontaneously-self-deleting Formspring accounts before either.

Of course everyone assumed she disappeared into oblivion in shame..

Too embarrassed to even talk about it or explain it.

Come on, it’s such a huge fuck up, if it happened to me I’d just bury my head in the ground and never appear online again!!!

I FEEL FOR YOU, REALLY, I DO!


…..But her lies just kept on coming.

Tonight, (12th December) Miss Dowager finally came back from being MIA and announced on her blog:



OMG!!!


Stop it already!!! You tickle meh!!!!!!

You’re honestly cracking all of us up. O____O

FIRST you leave a self-praising comment, then you get exposed,

next you got conveniently got HACKED,

and then you go MIA for 2 days

and now you come back telling the world you’ve had FOOD POISONING??

What’s next?? You won the lottery and donated it all to poverty coz you’re a kind soul like that?!?

And somehow, after all this, you still DON’T KNOW why your Formspring account got deleted?!!!???!!

Omitian.

Someone give her a prize for her efforts already, this woman deserves a medal for being so ridiculous to believe that we’d buy her story.

Magical self-deleting Formspring accounts!!! The new in thing. They self-destruct when they detect their owners are getting pwned. Technology keeps amazing me with every new invention.

Or maybe the blame is on a non-existent hacker that supposedly likes you but actually really really hates you.

Even if I’d chosen to give her the benefit of doubt, she REALLY killed it by saying she got FOOD POISONING. (that’s what I tell my teacher when I don’t feel like going to school)

Getting food poisoning at the same time you get hacked ?
That’s got to be in a Guinness Book of World Records (for lying) somewhere.

If I were her, I’d at least cover up by pretending to get my blog hacked along with my Formspring (save a copy somewhere so you can make it go back to normal after drama is over) and then pretend to be very traumatized.

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She claims to have not been online for 2 days as she’s been tossing and turning in bed in pain, then tell me,

WHY OH WHY, did she answer a few Formspring questions just YESTERDAY???

Wasn’t she meant to be sick in bed, and if you haven’t used the computer in TWO days, did your Formspring automatically answer itself again?

Izzit a new function I haven’t heard of from Peggytechnology?

And there is NO WAY she could have logged onto Formspring without receiving a swarm of insults or questions regarding the Self-Praising incident…

I’m sure she’s been working the Delete button on her Formspring like crazy recently.

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Btw, posting a picture of medicine on your blog isn’t going to fool us. Nice try.

What do you think we are???? Children?

Anyone who is even the least bit REMOTELY intelligent

can see through her disgusting lies.

I’m not going to bother entertaining her claims about me being a fake bitch, pretentious, bootlicker, fat, underachiever – really, she can say anything she wants.

Whatever she says is highly irrelevant and completely not credible now.

Nothing she says about me will top what she’s just done, so she can say whatever to comfort herself if it helps make her feel a little better.

Most of it is probably more lies anyway.

Like ANYONE’S going to take anything you say seriously from now on..?

Plus, as I mentioned before, the whole point of this post is not about the two of us bitching @ each other, cuz bitching is about negative opinions and rumours and some lies that can’t be proven wrong without evidence, whereas in this case, I have CONCRETE PROOF.

How is anybody going to discredit this, eh?

Miss Dowager, how do you expect people to still respect you????

Actually I almost feel really sorry for you while writing this post… but not really. You asked for it.

This whole post had to be said and done. I can’t stand it anymore.

And lastly….


“THEY”
are attempting to stir up shit? Ok, maybe XX and QQ a little, since they talked about you on Twitter.

What about me?

As much as I disliked you, did I even utter a word to diss ya? No.

I didn’t say shit, at least not on a public platform like Twitter.

And yet, the moment somebody mentioned I’m arrogant on your Formspring and asked why Wendy wants to be friends with me but not you – you took it as an opportunity to insult me by calling me a “suck up”?

It’s not my fault she doesn’t think you’re worth having as a friend.

Why did you have to come provoke me???

Oh well. You can pay the price now, coz everyone who reads this post will know what you did and who you are.

….If you hadn’t decided to camwhore with a $2 note in your mouth (seriously?? who does that? oh and did I mention she claims the note’s new from the bank? LOL)

If you had just kept your stinky mouth shut and not be bitchy about the situation coz money in your mouth is undoubedly filthy

If you hadn’t dragged me into your problem for no good reason…

None of this would have happened.

Now that she’s been getting so much shit from people, Dowager says she’s going to put an end to this whole saga.


O RLY?
You think you can just start shit with people by calling them a suck up and simply end it as and when you feel like it?


I think not.

I think you have some explaining to do to your readers, if you’d still like to have any supporters left at the end of the day.

Stop thinking you’re invincible coz you’re Peggy Heng, it really doesn’t mean much nowadays.

I’ll admit that I did like you before, as you enjoy going around telling people that as if it makes any difference now – 3 years ago when I was 15 years old, young and stupid..

But then I grew up, got smarter and better.. so don’t be mad coz I don’t look up to you as a blogger or a person anymore.

Don’t keep digging up the past to say kk? What matters is RIGHT NOW.

And right now you’re a capital L!

Loser.

Liar.

Erm.. lan jiao? Ok nvm you don’t have one.

A lot of things have changed since 3 years ago darling!

You’ve bitched about me and backstabbed me, and I’ve definitely done the same to you, everyone knows we’re both not innocent, so let’s not act like angels and be true to ourselves at least.


I know I’m a real BITCH too – it’s ok,
I don’t need any reminders.

But hey, at least I can admit it to the world and to myself!

I don’t try to put on a “nice girl” image like you.

Like one of my readers said, your constant “Holier-Than-Thou” attitude is annoying.

There is so much more nasty things I’d like to say about you, believe me, but let this post not be about random personal insults.

I want it to be a clear account of the blatant lies you’ve been telling these days, not just about me,

..but also about yourself.

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The moral of the story today, boys and girls, is….


If you can’t handle the HEAT, don’t play with FIRE!

xoxo,
Jess

xoxo,
Jess

PUDDING SAYS HI!!!!!! ♥


O hai evwyoneeeee!!!! ^.^

My name ish pudding, teh pudding hamster! (i noe right, so creatively named)

So vewy nice to meet you. *extends paw for a handshake*

I just got myself a lovely new owner yesturday and have alweady adapted well to my surroundings!!

My new home is a big glass tank, which is easy to clean and purrfect for Jess to view all my little furry, irresistable hammie antics that makes me her go “Awww” like crazy… Silly human!

I’m a curious little hammie who likes to play with new toys all the time! Adventurous and fun loving are my best traits…

I may nip lightly sometimes, but that’s only because I want to check you out. My bites don’t hurt very much, I pwomise!!

Some of my favouwite activities include burrowing around my bedding, throwing pink fluff evwywhere.. Squeeeeeeeee

Running around in my wittle hammie wheel so fast, you’d never be able to get a pwoper picture of me!

Jess says I’m already tooooo fat, so I need to work out and diet more! (but she keeps feeding me all sorts of treats.. evil human)

When I’m tired and sleeeeepy from all that playing and running around, I like to cuddle up into a puffball and take snoozes in the corner of my tank!


Oi!!

Stop poking me when I’m having my hammie naps, stupid human!!! (Yes, I like sleeping with my head squashed inbetween my abundant squishyness and the glass tank)

This is me spanking new home!! It doesn’t look like vewy much now, but Jess promised it’d be super pwetty and awesome once she’s done making and buying me toys and other decorations to pway with all the time..

She likes me a lot better because she says I’m much friendlier than the other hammie in the house, whose name I do not speak of because I want alllllllll her attention! ^.^

She drew and stuck this onto my tank today while I was sleeping! Me likes it vewy much *nods furry head*

Yup yup yup, that’s my name!

Okie, his hammieness is gettin sleepy now, it’s time for royal napz once again..

She wasn’t kidding, blogging is real tough work!!

I’ll talk to you humans again soon… hopefully next time Jess would take more photogenic shots for me and maybe photoshop my fat chin away!! ^.^


xoxo,
Pudding

xoxo,
Jess

What Inspires Me

Let us inspire each other.


Music

“Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music.”

My favourite song at the moment.. I can’t imagine why this singer does not have more listeners.

It’s so mellow, yet so strong in its own sense… So soft and lovely, it whispers into my ear all the things I want to hear. It reminds me of all the things I miss and want.

It speaks of hope, love and dreams. ♥

It makes me want to lay in a field full of sunflowers or daisies, dance around in a floaty dress on my tippy toes pretending I’m a ballerina.. it makes me want to fall asleep to this song every single night. I feel so carefree and at peace with the world :)

Another one.. if you liked the previous one, you’ll love this song too!

There are those who think that I’m strange, they would box me up and tell me to change.. but you hold me close and softly say that you wouldn’t have me any other way.

When words fail to express what I really mean, when my mind fails to process what’s really going on, when my heart is no longer capable of feeling properly… and most of all, when the world turns its back on me and it’s Me Vs The World again, music seems to be the one and only thing that has never failed me.

Any question that you may be the seeking the answer for lies in a song you may or may not have discovered yet.

When I’m feeling lonely, it keeps me company with its soft melodious tones, flowing through and wrapping itself around me like a warm blanket.

When I’m sad, it soothes my aching heart by assuring me that it knows exactly what I’m going through.. and that everything is going to be okay, because the music is still playing.

When I’m happy, it elevates my happiness and makes the moment extra personal and special, by singing along with me.

When I’m angry or frustrated, I like to blast edgy songs and scream along.. it’s nice to know someone else hates the world equally as much.

— Music inspires me because it knows the lyrics to my heart.

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Beautiful Images

“Photography is a way of feeling, of touching, of loving. What you have caught on film is captured forever… it remembers little things, long after you have forgotten everything.”

I would use the word “Photography”, but it sounds a little too superficial and technical for what it means to me. I care not for what lens or camera body I’m using, the only important in an image to me is the everlasting question :

How does it make you feel?

If it’s managed to awaken any emotion in you at all, then it is a meaningful image successful in inspiring people. Nothing else matters.

“Photography takes an instant out of time, altering life by holding it still.”

To suit the gorgeous songs I’ve posted above, I included some pictures of Flowers around Sam’s neighbourhood – Part 2! I like this bunch much better.

They’re so beautiful, I’ve never known flowers like these before. Consequence of staying in the city your whole life. Take some time to smell the roses…

“Whether he is an artist or not, the photographer is a joyous sensualist, for the simple reason that the eye traffics in feelings, not in thoughts.”

I love taking and sharing photos, because it allows me to show the world what I think of it. How else better to let people see the way you see things? Explaining in words is one thing, but seeing is believing.

I believe that anyone can be a good photographer, even with the lousiest camera, a true photo moment can never be wrecked by bad lighting or technical difficulties.

I feel like capturing memories and beauty on camera is like preserving the moment forever.

It can never be taken away from me, and even if my films and digital copies of the photos are destroyed, I’ll always remember the moment in the exact way I took the picture of.

It’s like I’ve decided, “Okay, so this is it. Take this picture and it stays with you forever.”

A photographer is like a painter, with his mind the paintbrush, the camera a canvas and the world an inspiration.

— Beautiful images inspire me by reminding me that there is always something beautiful in every situation, if only you would open your heart to it, then you could bring it out and see the beauty that would have otherwise gone unnoticed.

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My mum

“A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.”

She’s been traveling a lot and is hardly home recently, which has made me notice the effect of not having her around in my life. It feels emptier.

My mum is a very interesting woman.

Sometimes she’s caring, loving, understanding, and at other times she’s almost annoying, hostile and has a nasty temper.

But above all, she’s my skyscraper of strength and stability when all else in the world comes crashing down on my shoulders.

One of the things she used to say was, “You can choose your friends, but not your family.”

How I see it, she left out the words “….But you love them all the same” at the end of her quote.

It explains a lot about a mother’s love. Even before you were born, they started loving you already. After you were born, despite your differences and shortcomings, she still took care of you and watched over you as you grow older.

Even though she might relentlessly nag about how you’re not studying or working hard enough all the time, really, at the end of the day it doesn’t matter to her who the brightest student in the whole damn school is, because only one of them is her child, and that fact is irreplaceable.

Because of her, I’ve grown to become my own person, yet alike to her in so many ways she doesn’t understand.

The key concept to parenthood:

No child is ever perfect. They will make mistakes, and sometimes the harder you try to hold onto them, the further you are driving them away.

Give them some space, let them make their own fair share of mistakes and take risks the same way you got to live your own life when you were younger… eventually, they will always find their way back home.

Some might get a little lost on their way, and others would take longer than the rest but they’ll come back to you, just wait and see.

And then they’ll need someone to be waiting there for them, with wide open arms and non-judgemental eyes.

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Despite how overly concerned and protective she may be sometimes, she does allow me ample freedom, letting me live my life and to be my own person… and I think that’s the most important factor as to why I’m such a strong-headed, free-spirited individual.

Those who know me well know that I’m influenced by my mum in the littlest and biggest ways,

from the clothes I wear, to the way I live my life. She’s had a fulfilling life, with many ups and downs and one of her favourite things to do is tell her stories of what happened many years ago.


A very fond memory
is of her telling the story about how my dad didn’t want more children when she was expecting me (they already had my elder brother and he’s 8 years older, he thought it was too big a gap and didn’t wanna start all over again)

So he told my mum to go for an abortion, but she refused. She loved me even before I was born.

My dad got pissed off and exclaimed that he wouldn’t pay for my medical expenses, etc, and that I was “her” responsibility and not his. She agreed, and true enough, eventually when I was born, he wasn’t even at the hospital bed with her, he was on holiday, doing something else he shouldn’t have been doing..

She went on to tell me how heartbreaking it is to be a single mother and through all that sadness, she managed to find hope and at the end of her heartbreaking story, she looked at me and said,

“But I wouldn’t have had it any other way, because then I wouldn’t have you.”

And then she hugged me.

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My mother is amazing like that :’) So tearing up while typing this.

Right there and then, I wanted to cry because I felt so sad about her story but loved because it was all done for me.. but I didn’t, I put up a strong front because I always wanna act tough in front of my mum.

Not because I’m afraid of showing my emotions, because I don’t want her to worry.

I want her to think and know that I am always happy, healthy, and strong. (Which I am 99% of the time)

I don’t want her to know that really, I’m a big softie and can be quite the emotional wreck, crying over everything and nothing in particular.

But to me, crying is not a weakness.

You might think I’m crazy for saying this, but when my heart is aching, my mind and body overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions and I’m gasping for breath between my heavy sobs….

I feel the most alive.

If you are hurt, it means you care, and if you care, then there is something to live for.

You don’t see dead people (emotionally and physically) crying too often now, do you? It’s because their hearts are cold, numb and empty. I’d rather hurt than feel nothing at all.

I think that makes me special, being able to look at what other people might consider flaws and imperfections as character and beauty. That is why I’m so different from my dad. It’s because I am like my mum.

My dad has tried to use that as an insult against me. But he’s the one who has never known a proper loving relationship between parent and child.

And that is also why I love my mum. ♥


— My mum inspires me to do the right thing
, to be my own person, and to love unconditionally.

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My boyfriend

I’ve said so many things about Sam on my blog, that I’m not sure if there’s much left I can say.

If somebody who’s not family and has absolutely no obligations to me could love me so damn willingly and selflessly, then heck, there must be some sort of crazy beauty in myself that I don’t see.

What kind of girl makes another guy want to put his entire life on hold and drop everything he has just to spend time with her?

Or rather, what kind of guy would be so crazy to do something drastic like that?!

It’s so much more than money, time, and effort.

It’s about believing that what you’re doing and who you’re doing it for is truly and completely worth it all.

Oceans and countries apart didn’t stop him from reaching out to me. It’s hard not to believe in destiny and fate when it happens to you in such a fairytale way. I was trying to get my over my ex, then I met this funny and interesting guy online who was everything I wanted my ex to be… but of course he had to be in another country.

I remember crying to myself before I went to bed one night, thinking how tragic it was that I’d never be able to meet this guy who could make me so very happy just by talking to me.

He was so near yet so far.

He’d would accompany me everyday when I needed someone and be the lullaby I’d fall asleep to… certain days I could almost swear I felt him right here with me but he’s a good 8 hour plane flight away.

Then something magical happened.

Sometimes I still can’t believe he traveled across the world just to meet me. My ex use to complain that couldn’t even be bothered traveling to my place as we lived quite far.

Well… Sam’s the man to prove that any distance is not one too far for him.

Our relationship has really been testing my limits as to how much of a selfless person I can be. It can get awfully tiring and trying, but the whole point is that it pushes me to fight for what I believe in.

And I believe in us.

My boyfriend inspires me by helping me discover things about myself only he can bring out.

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And of course, you, my readers, and my blog, inspire me daily.

You’re a big part of the person I am now and I owe almost all of my individuality to this little private space of mine on the internet.

Thank you for all the encouragement and support, the laughs and the tears, for sharing parts of my life with me but most of all, the experience of having a blog that takes you places.

That’s a few of the many, many things that inspire me daily.


What inspires you?

xoxo,
Jess

xoxo,
Jess
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