randomnessity

Mannnnnnnnn.

I am so tired. My body’s all warm and dizzy-ish, like I have a fever, but I don’t, I’m just dead tired.

I love to sleep.

I need my beauty sleep!

I set my alarm at 5:30am this morning.

I woke up, and I stared into the space awhile as this question suddenly drifted into my mind:

Hmmm.. what should I wear today?

As I was thinking about it, sudden movements from my bed distracted me from my thoughts.
And what do you know?

It’s james holding my hand.

And I expected him to lean over and smile dreamily while gazing into my eyes and say, “Good morning dear sleepyhead~…”

.

.

But instead,

he turned over, FROWNED at me and said, “7.a.m already why are you still at homeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Having heard that, I jolted up from bed chanting, “oh shit oh shit oh shit.”

And called a cab. Within 20 minutes, I was already in the taxi on my way to school.

Which, by the way, costed me fucking $20. A waste of money & energy & time.

I have no idea why I was thinking of what to wear in the morning, when obviously the only thing I could appear in school in is my uniform.

And that was how my day started.

Random, I know.

But which fucking insane girl would drag her ass out of bed at a fucking insane time of 7.a.m to take a fucking $20 taxi ride to go to school during her fucking holidays?


Definitely not me.



Too bad my teacher’s been calling my house up so often using O’Level threats against me T___T

Oh well.. I’m not going tomorrow anyway.
HAHAHAHA.

Okayyyyyyy.. I don’t really feel like blogging anymore. =(

I feel fucking sick. My eyes hurt. My head feels really heavy. I want sleep. I want James.

GOODBYE,

I’ll leave you with pictures taken just now with dear Serene~

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do not be deceived by this picture, i am definitelyyyy taller than her! :P

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this is the face i like to give james whenever he doesn’t let me have things my way =D

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trying to act shy shy.. LOL

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we are very normal. I SWEAR!

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wahahaha, TU LAN!!!~

no more funny shots.. the rest are vain obsessions :)

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absolutely in love with this dress.

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xoxo jess


xoxo,
Jess

fucked

Why is it that I’m NEVER able to get things right?

Every single time I think that my life is getting better,

I’m back down in the dumps again.

Everytime I feel that we’re getting somewhere in this relationship,

I’m right back to square one.

I feeeeeeel fucking suicidal.

I tried. You tried.

We know we’ve tried.

So why can’t we work it out? It just doesn’t make sense.

I’VE BEEN TRYING SO HARD FOR OVER A FUCKING YEAR TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT.

I just wanna make things right babe.

I’m sorry for all the wrong things I’ve done, and I just wish I could be more perfect for you.

I’d rather let it all out here on my blog than to tell you myself..

cuz I know there’s just not much left to say anymore.

So if this is what he wants, and it’s what she wants..

then why is there so much pain?



xoxo,
Jess
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